To Betty, The Grisette

Queen of wit and beauty, Betty,     Never may the Muse forget ye,     How thy face charms every shepherd,     Spotted over like a leopard!     And thy freckled neck, display'd,     Envy breeds in every maid;     Like a fly-blown cake of tallow,     Or on parchment ink turn'd yellow;     Or a tawny speckled pippin,     Shrivell'd with a winter's keeping.         And, thy beauty thus dispatch'd,     Let me praise thy wit unmatch'd.         Sets of phrases, cut and dry,     Evermore thy tongue supply;     And thy memory is loaded     With old scraps from plays exploded;     Stock'd with repartees and jokes,     Suited to all Christian folks:     Shreds of wit, and senseless rhymes,     Blunder'd out a thousand times;     Nor wilt thou of gifts be sparing,     Which can ne'er be worse for wearing.     Picking wit among collegians,     In the playhouse upper regions;     Where, in the eighteen-penny gallery,     Irish nymphs learn Irish raillery.     But thy merit is thy failing,     And thy raillery is railing.         Thus with talents well endued     To be scurrilous and rude;     When you pertly raise your snout,     Fleer and gibe, and laugh and flout;     This among Hibernian asses     For sheer wit and humour passes.     Thus indulgent Chloe, bit,     Swears you have a world of wit.