The Jolly Miller

[Restored Romaunt.]     It was a Jolly Miller lived on the River Dee;     He looked upon his piller, and there he found a flea:      "O Mr. Flea! you have bit' me,         And you shall shorely die!"      So he scrunched his bones against the stones -         And there he let him lie!     Twas then the Jolly Miller he laughed and told his wife,     And she laughed fit to kill her, and dropped her carvin'-knife! -      "O Mr. Flea!" "Ho-ho!" "Tee-hee!"         They both laughed fit to kill,      Until the sound did almost drownd         The rumble of the mill!     "Laugh on, my Jolly Miller! and Missus Miller, too! -     But there's a weeping-willer will soon wave over you!"      The voice was all so awful small -         So very small and slim! -      He durst' infer that it was her,         Ner her infer 'twas him!     That night the Jolly Miller, says he, "It's Wifey dear,     That cat o' yourn, I'd kill her! - her actions is so queer, -      She rubbin' 'ginst the grindstone-legs,         And yowlin' at the sky -      And I 'low the moon haint greener         Than the yaller of her eye!"     And as the Jolly Miller went chuckle-un to bed,     Was Somepin jerked his piller from underneath his head!      "O Wife," says he, on-easi-lee,         "Fetch here that lantern there!"      But Somepin moans in thunder tones,         "You tetch it ef you dare!"     'Twas then the Jolly Miller he trimbled and he quailed -     And his wife choked until her breath come back, 'n' she wailed!      And "O!" cried she, "it is the Flea,         All white and pale and wann -      He's got you in his clutches, and         He's bigger than a man!"     "Ho! ho! my Jolly Miller," (fer 'twas the Flea, fer shore!)     "I reckon you'll not rack my bones ner scrunch 'em any more!"      And then the Ghost he grabbed him clos't,         With many a ghastly smile,      And from the doorstep stooped and hopped         About four hundred mile!