Jonathan Swift

"Dull uniformity in fools     I hate, who gape and sneer by rules;     You, Mullinix, and slobbering C -    -     Who every day and hour the sa"

"ON THE EVER-LAMENTED LOSS OF THE TWO YEW-TREES IN THE PARISH OF CHILTHORNE, SOMERSET. 1706. IMITATED FROM THE EIGHTH BOOK OF OVID     In anci"

"The thresher Duck[1] could o'er the queen prevail,     The proverb says, "no fence against a flail."     From threshing corn he turns to thresh"

"On one Delacourt's complimenting Carthy on his Poetry     Carthy, you say, writes well - his genius true,     You pawn your word for him - he'l"

"As when, from rooting in a bin,     All powder'd o'er from tail to chin,     A lively maggot sallies out,     You know him by his hazel snout:"

"As when of old some sorceress threw     O'er the moon's face a sable hue,     To drive unseen her magic chair,     At midnight, through the dar"

"In church your grandsire cut his throat;         To do the job too long he tarried:     He should have had my hearty vote         To cut his th"

"Ye wise, instruct me to endure     An evil, which admits no cure;     Or, how this evil can be borne,     Which breeds at once both hate and sc"

"Two-faced Janus,[1] god of Time!     Be my Phoebus while I rhyme;     To oblige your crony Swift,     Bring our dame a new year's gift;     Sh"

"A set of phrases learn'd by rote;     A passion for a scarlet coat;     When at a play, to laugh or cry,     Yet cannot tell the reason why;"

"There is a gate, we know full well,     That stands 'twixt Heaven, and Earth, and Hell,     Where many for a passage venture,     Yet very few"

"Your house of hair, and lady's hand,     At first did put me to a stand.     I have it now - 'tis plain enough -     Your hairy business is a"

"IN THE PERSON OF A LADY IN THE NORTH [l] 1730     Resolved my gratitude to show,     Thrice reverend Dean, for all I owe,     Too long I have"

"[1]     Great cry, and little wool - is now become     The plague and proverb of the weaver's loom;     No wool to work on, neither weft nor warp"

"Thus spoke great Bedel[1] from his tomb:     "Mortal, I would not change my doom,     To live in such a restless state,     To be unfortunately"

"To The Honourable Mrs. Finch,[1] Under Her Name Of Ardelia     Phoebus, now short'ning every shade,         Up to the northern tropic came,"

"The furniture that best doth please     St. Patrick's Dean, good Sir, are these:     The knife and fork with which I eat;     And next the pot"

"Salmoneus,[1] as the Grecian tale is,     Was a mad coppersmith of Elis:     Up at his forge by morning peep,     No creature in the lane could"

"JULY 28, 1728     Sure never did man see     A wretch like poor Nancy,     So teazed day and night     By a Dean and a Knight.     To punish"

"Sir Robert,[2] wearied by Will Pulteney's teasings,     Who interrupted him in all his leasings,     Resolved that Will and he should meet no mo"

"A long-ear'd beast, and a field-house for cattle,     Among the coals doth often rattle.[1]     A long-ear'd beast, a bird that prates,     Th"

"Friend Rundle fell, with grievous bump,     Upon his reverential rump.     Poor rump! thou hadst been better sped,     Hadst thou been join'd t"

"BY DR. DELANY     Amphora, quae moestum linquis, laetumque revises         Arentem dominum, sit tibi terra levis.     Tu quoque depositum serv"

"The following lines occur in the Swiftiana, and are by Mr. Wilson, the editor, ascribed to Swift. - Scott.     " -    -    The rascal! that's to"

"That you, friend Marcus, like a stoic,     Can wish to die in strains heroic,     No real fortitude implies:     Yet, all must own, thy wish is"

"REVEREND AND LEARNED SIR,     I am teacher of English, for want of a better, to a poor charity-school, in the lower end of St. Thomas's Street;"

"WRITTEN IN NOVEMBER, 1693     Thrice, with a prophet's voice, and prophet's power,         The Muse was called in a poetic hour,     And inso"

"Behold, those monarch oaks, that rise     With lofty branches to the skies,     Have large proportion'd roots that grow     With equal longitud"

"OR BARON (ALIAS BARREN) LOVEL'S CHARGE AT THE ASSIZES AT EXON, APRIL 5, 17IO     Risum teneatis? - HORAT., Ars Poetica, 5.                 F"

"But he by bawling news about,         And aptly using brush and clout,         A justice of the peace became,         To punish rogues who"

"Vertiginosus, inops, surdus, male gratus amicis;     Non campana sonans, tonitru non ab Jove missum,     Quod mage mirandum, saltem si credere f"

"IN COMITATU CORGAGENSI.    SCRIPSIT JUN. ANN. DOM. 1723     Ecce ingens fragmen scopuli, quod vertice summo     Desuper impendet, nullo fund"

"WITH A PRESENT OF A PAPER-BOOK, FINELY BOUND, ON HIS BIRTH-DAY, NOV. 30, 1732.[1] BY JOHN, EARL OF ORRERY     To thee, dear Swift, these spotles"

"Moor Park, Feb. 14, 1691.     I     As when the deluge first began to fall,         That mighty ebb never to flow again,     When this hug"

"WRITTEN IN 1737     At Dublin's high feast sat Primate and Dean,     Both dress'd like divines, with band and face clean:     Quoth Hugh of A"

"INSTRUCTIONS TO A PAINTER[1]     Happiest of the spaniel race,     Painter, with thy colours grace:     Draw his forehead large and high,"

"My latest tribute here I send,     With this let your collection end.     Thus I consign you down to fame     A character to praise or blame:"

"In times of old, when Time was young,     And poets their own verses sung,     A verse would draw a stone or beam,     That now would overload"

"BEING AN EXCELLENT NEW SONG, SUPPOSED TO BE MADE, AND SUNG IN THE STREETS OF DUBLIN, BY WILLIAM WOOD, IRONMONGER AND HALFPENNY-MONGER. 1725"

"1729                                          - Tanti tibi non sit opaci     Omnis arena Tagi quodque in mare volvitur aurum. - Juv. iii, 54"

"A few of the first lines were wanting in the copy sent us by a friend of the Author's from London. - Dublin Edition.             *        *"

"The church I hate, and have good reason,     For there my grandsire cut his weasand:     He cut his weasand at the altar;     I keep my gullet"

"1723          - cuicumque nocere volebat,     Vestimenta dabat pretiosa.[1]     Don Carlos, in a merry spight,     Did Stella to his house"

"I often wish'd that I had clear,     For life, six hundred pounds a-year,     A handsome house to lodge a friend,     A river at my garden's en"

"To mournful ditties, Clio, change thy note,     Since cruel fate has sunk our Justice Boat;     Why should he sink, where nothing seem'd to pres"

"The Scottish hinds, too poor to house     In frosty nights their starving cows,     While not a blade of grass or hay     Appears from Michaelm"

"ON MR. FORD[1]     Come, be content, since out it must,     For Stella has betray'd her trust;     And, whispering, charged me not to say"

"The scriptures affirm (as I heard in my youth,     For indeed I ne'er read them, to speak for once truth)     That death is the wages of sin, bu"

"To the tune of "Ye Commons and Peers."                 Dingley and Brent,                 Wherever they went,     Ne'er minded a word that was"

"Though I, alas! a prisoner be,     My trade is prisoners to set free.     No slave his lord's commands obeys     With such insinuating ways."

"Poor ladies! though their business be to play,     'Tis hard they must be busy night and day:     Why should they want the privilege of men,"

"The joy of man, the pride of brutes,     Domestic subject for disputes,     Of plenty thou the emblem fair,     Adorn'd by nymphs with all thei"

"I like your collyrium,     Take my eyes, sir, and clear ye 'um,         'Twill gain you a great reputation;     By this you may rise,     Like"

"[1] WRITTEN IN OCT., 1710; AND FIRST PRINTED IN "THE TATLER," NO. 238     Careful observers may foretell the hour,     (By sure prognostics,)"

"THE SEAT OF GEORGE ROCHFORT, ESQ.     BY DR. DELANY     'Tis so old and so ugly, and yet so convenient,     You're sometimes in pleasure, th"

"We fly from luxury and wealth,     To hardships, in pursuit of health;     From generous wines, and costly fare,     And dozing in an easy-chai"

"Thanks to my stars, I once can see     A window here from scribbling free!     Here no conceited coxcombs pass,     To scratch their paltry dra"

"1718     Dear Dean, since in cruxes and puns you and I deal,     Pray why is a woman a sieve and a riddle?     'Tis a thought that came into m"

"Of Chloe all the town has rung,     By ev'ry size of poets sung:     So beautiful a nymph appears     But once in twenty thousand years;     B"

"[1]     WRITTEN IN AUGUST, 1702     I     Once on a time, as old stories rehearse,         A friar would need show his talent in Latin;     B"